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17-08-00 news EXCLUSIVE: PAUL MARTIN
Posh's only Irish Interview...

POSH Spice Victoria Beckham has revealed how much she has been hurt by the cruel jibes about her life. In an exclusive interview with the Irish Mirror, the star told how she has been reduced to tears by the criticism of her image, leaving her deeply upset. And she hit back at those who sniped about her weight loss after giving birth to her son Brooklyn, vowing to never give in.

She said: "I never lost weight that's the truth of it. I'm wearing the same clothes now as before Brooklyn was born 15-months ago. "They say the camera never lies, but it does. I'm living proof of that. "I was being tortured in the press for months about my weight, but I'd never even lost it in the first place. "It was just the camera angles. "One day there would be a photograph where I was looking skinny, the next I would look normal again.

"Even if I have a bad hair day it's all over the front pages. I don't get it, what's the big deal? "Yes, I have bad hair days like everyone else, but so what?

"What people forget is that I am a human being. "I have a heart too. "I might have made a good living out of the pop business, but I still have feelings and I sometimes get upset when people make swipes at me. "Music and fame comes second to my family. "The most important things to me are my baby son and my husband. "I'm a family woman and when I constantly read bad comments about the way I look and live it gets me down.

"I feel sad about it sometimes, although I've taught myself to get over it. "Now I just try not to read the nasty stories and listen to the rumours, but the truth is that sometimes it hurts deeply and there's no avoiding it."

Despite her fame, Victoria, 26, said she and soccer star husband David Beckham, 25, have just one aim in life - to have a normal upbringing for their son Brooklyn. She said: "I just pray that he finds a good set of friends when he starts school. "I know myself that children can be awfully cruel sometimes. "When I was growing up I was the victim of some really nasty bullying at school. "Nothing would hurt me more than to see Brooklyn suffering, but hopefully that will never happen. "I just hope that the fame David and I have doesn't disadvantage him and make him an easy target."

Though still a Spice Girl, Victoria has now launched her solo career with the song Out Of Your Mind, a duet with Truesteppers singer Dane Bowers. But she admitted that with nearly 50 million pounds in the bank, she had no need to jump back into the unforgiving world of pop music.

But she said: "People think that I must just be in it for the money but the truth is I love music. "That's why I joined the Spice Girls; that's why I performed almost every night when I was growing up; that's why I'm still working. "But there are big prices to pay along with the success. I have lost my freedom and even though I have an influential voice, at the same time I'm inviting everyone to have an opinion on me."

Away from the flashing cameras and constant glare of the media Victoria revealed she has a grounded lifestyle. She said: "I go down to the local supermarket and buy my own groceries like everyone else. "I do my own washing whenever I get the time and my mum Jackie helps out a lot at home too. "She comes over and looks after Brooklyn when I'm working. "But when I am away for a long time I try to take him with me. "I get up in the morning around 9am and make Brooklyn his breakfast. "Then we usually go out somewhere just to have a bit of time together. "The other day we made a picnic and went to the zoo but other times we just go for a drive or a long walk.

"I always have security with me though, although I've cut back on it a lot in the last year. "But for the sake of Brooklyn I always have someone looking out for us. "But they always stay far enough away so that we can spend time on our own. "I would never put Brooklyn's safety at risk so if that means having to take a bodyguard everywhere then I'm prepared to do it."

After eight No1 singles and several sell-out world tours with the Spice Girls, Victoria is one of the richest pop stars in the world. But she confessed that a half-price sale at her local Next store is still too much to resist. She said: "I can't help clothes shopping, I just love it. And of course I'll take up a bargain if I get the chance. "I love to shop and why pay twice as much as necessary? It doesn't matter how much money you have. "I also get loads of free clothes sent to me, it gets quite ridiculous sometimes because I get so much. "When I was first starting out in the music business I couldn't afford new clothes. "But now I've made my money, I suddenly get everything free. I don't understand it."

"Ann Summers sends me a lot of nice underwear which David likes me to wear for obvious reasons. "I also get make-up, shoes and other weird stuff that you wouldn't even believe. "I can't use most of it so I give it out to family and friends, they aren't complaining."

Despite her success, Victoria is still the brunt of jibes about her singing ability. But she said people who say her live performances are not up to scratch should have more important things to worry about. She said: "If people want to say that I can't sing then let them say that. "I am working bloody hard on a new Spice Girls album, my own album and the Truesteppers album. "At the same time, I am trying to bring up a son. So if they don't like my songs then they don't have to buy them. "The fact is that my new song is a dance music song. "Everyone knows that you have to add bits in and create a different sound which makes it hard to sing totally live. "I also wanted to dance when I am performing the song.

"If you look at all the great performers like Michael Jackson, Janet Jackson and even Britney Spears, they don't always sing live on stage. "I am no different to them, but I have to take this constant criticism. "I am fed up having to say to people that I can do this and I can do that. "At the end of the day my album will prove that I can sing. "I've been singing live on Spice Girls world tours for two years now. "Anyone who came to a show will know that I wasn't miming."

And Victoria revealed that she wants to have more children once she has more time. She said: "I would love to have another three by the time I am 35. "I want to have loads of kids running around the house because I know I would be a great mum. "At the minute I am going to be busy recording the new album but there will be more kids in the future. "I would like to have more when the pressures of my job are not as intense.

"Sometimes it can be very hard when you are touring. "You are forced to spend time away from home and that is hard for the child. "I think it takes so much to be a truly good parent, there are far more pressures than being in a pop band. "But at the same time there's also a much bigger reward. "There's nothing like seeing a child growing up and knowing you are responsible for them. "I don't mind how many boys or girls I might have I would just hope that they would all be healthy.

"David is a great dad. He just loves Brooklyn to bits - people don't see that side of him. "As soon as he comes home from training he starts playing with him. He's the best dad in the world.

"Maybe when I'm about 40 I can retire and David and I will go away somewhere with the kids. "But I love living in England and this will always be my home. My children will all go to school here.

"All the rumours about me putting pressure on David to leave Manchester are a load of rubbish. "I am happy with the way things are and so is David. "If we weren't then we wouldn't still be here."